# reverse seasonal affective disorder
thankfully it's friday at last
researchers it's been a long week a two-week-week as i put it
slow humid ass uk summer time drags on and on
recently experienced some particularly saddening sunsets which have really got me down
something about the summertime makes me feel acutely blue / existentially depressed
the bright meridian totem heat of day ok fair enough that's merely hot sweaty and hateful
yet the light of dusk feels so intense and strange
i'm suddenly attacked by a piercing loneliness and alienation
it's like i can't find a way out of an overwhelming labyrinth
one constructed of childhood memories of being alone on that miserable housing estate
with feeling like i'm the only person alive on an empty alien world
there's nowhere better to go back to or look forward to because right here is all there ever was
i see a cat off hunting in the background
slight desert wind noise blows through the secret ruins of an otherwise perfectly normal suburban housing development nowhere stretching on to the horizon
the versatile plastic construction plastic sheeting used for dust containment moisture barriers and surface protection in construction that comes in different gauges
nothing but red slate roofing tiles and a painful silent sense of all consuming loss
time to get back into that sentient stealth bioelectric microlight take off and slowly chase that ever-receding sunset
though in search of what precisely
// republic of bob