# technical review of marginalia by connor sherlock marginalia is a horror garme by connor sherlock developer of amazing atmospheric experience "sanctuary" this is a technical review of marginalia and says little about the atmosphere of teh garme (which feels kinda interesting and aesthetically engaging - less so than connor's previous garmes - but not really scary at all) **+** the voice over sounds slightly muffled - at one point it mentions packs of wild dogs roaming the streets but it sounds like "packs of wild ducks" which actually / unfortunately sounds slightly better **+** the (good) accompanying soundtrack would sound better if more intermittent allowing for more environmental noise / silence; more wind in the trees and footsteps through the tall grass seems needed **+** perhaps the disembodied voice of the narrator should somehow be more embedded in the landscape - perhaps as loose pages the player can collect and then 'listen' to (actually no that's a bit too slenderman) **+** the writing's bit corny; in particular the bit about dark 'seeds growing' - and somehow sounds unnecessarily noirish **+** what the player does not know is the disembodied walker's relationship to the mysterious "eric" ey seeks - and therefore any motivational sense why they are seeking ir out **+** twenty seconds before the end of teh garme the narrator suddenly goes off on an emotional tangent rambling wildly about 'machines'. it's considerably out of tone with the rest of ir delivery up to that point and sounds awkward **+** if the music had actually stopped at the moment the walker reaches the 'machines' it would of made far more impact **+** it did not seem possible to change the fov in the menu in the current build **+** generally there seems a disconnect between what the player is able to do in this narrative space - just walk - and the potential for 'playing the meanings' of teh garme through environmental interaction **+** the tone set up by the mixture of environment and narration needs to be more narrow and specific. is this is a horrible memory-dream with a terrifying punchline? or is it just meant to feel generally creepy from beginning to end? **+** what i'd do different is tweak the writing and delivery it differently - more matter of factly - in the same way one readily goes along with dream logic - simply strolling through a well lit wood at night.. until it all starts getting distinctly nightmarish // republic of bob