# bad writing in the novelist garme the novelist" based on cliched ideas concerning "the writer" "writing" and "storytelling in video garmes" video trailer here one suspects the developer is trying to weld or shoehorn traditional storytelling (whatever that is) into garming's dynamic interactive spaces that is the novelist seems merely to reinforces vapid cliches and stereotypes about these three elements rather than using video garming to challenge them - or at least make potentially 'novel' statements about them its single sentence bumper sticker selling point / statement as a tall vague order to fill: "a garme about life family and the choices you make" a better idea: to directly address the player's role andor teh garme's mechanics / rules eg. "you're a ghost in a writer's house - choose how and when to help or hinder ir career." make it precise - yet open to a player's interpretation (through how they play) "dan kaplan is a novelist." first off who says so and why should we believe them? (after all jack torrance probably once just say himself as 'just a writer'.) secondly that's vague (and not deliberately vague which is often better.) thirdly just call ir dan - who cares about ir second name? note how the sound of the writer(tm) typing makes ir roles somehow concrete and permanent: writer - husband - father. sure these roles will probably change over time due to the player.. but what might be more interesting is to say: "this is dan. ey calls himself a writer husband and father. but is ey - and in what ways?" why is dan kaplan not using a shiny apple mac and why is ir kid not busy screaming threatening racist homophobic and misogynistic obscenities into a mic while playing "call of duty: f#nutz" on ir xbone in the basement? (is this not a traditional middle class family?) the sombre even bleak tone of the music playing in the background somehow does not quite fit teh garme's aesthetic. and if it does fit it perfectly one suspects teh garme's mechanics might not fit well with this mood. (not sure what's being said here) dan's has pinky white skin owns a nice large (summer!) house and sports a bad moustache. players who do not belong to this impossibly narrow and unlikely-sounding demographic might not care for these arguably arbitrary narrative / contextual constraints. this despite the developer's "[..] desire for relatable universal subject matter" a ghost is not automatically novel simply because "the novelist" happens to be using it. what is the link between the writer and the ghost? there should be one. why even say the player's a ghost? perhaps you shouldn't don't even hint at the possibility - if anything a garme's mechanics should stimulate the player's imagination "ir is struggling to manage it all." oh boy another struggling writer. what a calamity of cliches. (one hopes this is due directly to the player's choice) "discover what they want." what they say they want is only interesting to the degree a player's choices within teh garme's rule system hold your attention (they don't have to be 'meaningful') dan states in ir letter that "it's just an execution problem not a lack of inspiration or ideas." one begs to differ dan 'struggling writer' kaplan // republic of bob